For my piece, that is what I am shooting for, that my audience feels that they are in my shoes, doing the work, and actually see whats taking place. I want to create the feeling of inclusion from the reader, but make sure they understand the 'why' and 'how' behind the science being done.
As I read "Uncle Tungsten," I could actually visualize myself being there and watching everything taking place. I kept looking at my wedding ring, because it is made of tungsten also. I not only found the profile piece to be interesting and entertaining, I found it very educational. I knew tungsten was very hard, but never knew why it never looks tarnished like gold or platinum. In that aspect, I thought the story was really cool!!
It will be interesting to read other pieces just to see how we each approach our project. I want to make sure mine is a fun paper, yet one that will educate as well as entertain.
Thought the emergency removal of a tungsten ring was interesting....
Finger rings made of extremely hard materials (tungsten carbide or ceramic) can only be removed by cracking them into pieces with standard vice grip-style locking pliers. Standard ring cutters will not be effective (Figure 1).
Place vice grip-style locking pliers over ring and adjust the jaws to clamp lightly. Release and adjust tightener one-third turn and then clamp again. Repeat until a crack is heard, and then continue clamping in different positions until the hard material breaks away.
Take care not to slide or rotate the cracked ring on the finger. If the ring contains an inlay of gold, the exposed gold can then be cut or clipped in the usual fashion (Figures 2 and 3).
Return larger pieces to the owner because they may receive a replacement from the manufacturer.
Stanley V. Hajduk, MD
It's not necessarily easy to write in such a way that the reader is drawn into the story, but I agree with you that that is when a story can be considered to be "best" or someone's "favorite." The read seems quicker and easier. In the really good ones like Uncle Tungsten, there seems to be a balanced, flowing mixture of narrative, sensual information, dialog and stuff into that, the ultimate goal of what we're trying to do here: educate. From afar, it seems like a tall, tall order and (at least to me) a little intimidating, but up close, it's just a matter of tweaking and twisting and turning words until they fit just right. Hallelujah for revision, lol!
ReplyDeleteThe emergency ring removal makes my fingers feel all frightened.
ReplyDeleteThat closeness you're talking about is really pretty key in a couple of pieces that we read. I think it's more than just making the scientist seem human, you have to do it in just the right way. Not just human, I guess, but also like someone you could know and know well.
Kelly, used the word "flowing" in his comment and I think that's a great word to describe a couple of the profiles that we've read.
Susan Andrus